The Faces of God

The God of my childhood had many changing faces but the one I remember liking the most was when He didn’t have a face at all. That was long before family, church and the entire world so rudely and thoughtlessly trampled all over my spiritual purity. Back then, God didn’t even have a name, and maybe He wasn’t even a *He*, but a *She* or something else entirely and magically different. My very young childhood tells me God was light...

When the Pain of Addiction gets Real

When the pain of addiction gets real. Someone I love lays in a cold, dim hospital room tonight. His body is weak with dehydration and sick from years of the kind of cruelty only addiction can bestow on the mind and body. Addiction is a special breed of illness. It can give you a new life or steal the one you have. And it has all the time in the world so it doesn’t mind your slow suffering. Addiction is...

How I Became a Dog Person

I love animals. But I don’t consider myself a *dog person*. I don’t *not* like and appreciate dogs, I am just not one of those people who falls in love with every dog I see.  In my opinion, dogs are like children and some of them are just too annoying to want to be around. Personally, I *prefer* cats  as pets. Because quite honestly, they don’t require constant attention and can basically fend for themselves. They don’t stare at you...

Unbecoming

Written in reflection on 5/24/16 Unbecoming We see, when the work is complete, the artists vision. Only when darkness fades away will light reveal hidden secrets Truths won’t hurt as much, and even now, their sting diminished- time itself is not the healer I have discovered. Masks won’t hide truth Forever. When we see with eyes open inward, the reflection of others living iwithin A Great Truth is born In that moment, we see one another truly see our lies...

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

In my sober life, there are no small decisions. Everything is a Big Deal.  One thing I have continuously struggled with the entire seven years and five months of my sobriety is making a decision.  Any decision. And we all know that if we desire change, some variety of a decision must be made. And today I desire changes. Great Big Changes. Before I was sober I could enlist the help of a substance to help me. I usually had...

Life of Hope-continued…

The Calm Before the Storm : For all rational reasons unknown to me, I managed to quite literally, escape my Black Hole life and find hope. We eventually landed on an island in one piece, which was a miracle in itself considering I had no money, a car that didn’t actually belong to me, no plan, no connections and very little support. I ran out of gas on the island and decided to call it home for the next eight...

Changing Directions, Part I

If you don’t like the life you’re living. DO something about it! Make a commitment to change your direction. I did. And if I can, so can you. I’ve lived many different lives (more than nine), so I know it’s possible. The life I’m living today is my best one yet. It’s working out pretty good for me, but I assure you, when it doesn’t, I will be doing something about it. Here are a few lives I’ve lived: The...

Live. Create. Repeat.

 The spirit of creativity lives in all of us.  Everyday we use our creative powers to make our little piece of the world a more interesting and beautiful place.  Creating living is something we all do. We are artists of our own lives. How do you create yours? The other day I was sitting on my living room floor completely immersed in the project of affixing broken pieces of sea shells to fishing line and attaching them to a branch....

Enlightenment through Kitchen Renovation. No-really.

Usually I don’t expect much out of home improvement projects outside of the anticipated improvement-which is gratifying in and of itself. The process can be equally demanding and rewarding, as expected. Nothing too surprising. However, my recent endeavor proved to be more than just transforming my kitchen into a better kitchen. I wouldn’t be going out on a limb to say that it was eye opening, humbling, challenging and…enlightening.  The other day my husband and I were standing around our...

Fire Power

Although my kitchen is in shambles and I’m washing dishes in the bathtub,  life is pretty good these days.   Despite my challenges (kitchen), I embrace most days with some sense of gratitude and adventure, although some days I question everything I knew was right just the day before. For example, two days ago I thought it would be a good idea to tear up the kitchen, now I question that. As gratifying and intriguing as life can be for me...